Difficult conversations are an inevitable part of life—especially at work. But do you give yourself time and space for difficult conversations? Whether you’re providing feedback, managing conflict, supporting someone through change, or addressing performance, the way we approach these moments can shape relationships, trust, and outcomes.
While many of us focus on what we’re going to say, we often overlook two vital elements: time and space. When it comes to difficult conversations, choosing when and where to talk is just as important as how you communicate.
Why timing matters
Rushing into a difficult conversation without giving yourself (or the other person) time can increase defensiveness, confusion, or emotional reactions. Taking a moment to prepare mentally and emotionally can make your message clearer and more compassionate. Making sure you don’t have other priorities on your time is also important – so that it’s clear to the other person that you are present and they’re time is equally as important as yours. Timing also means being sensitive to the other person’s state—are they stressed, distracted, or more open to listening?
Why space matters—physically and emotionally
The setting of a conversation can influence how it’s received. A quiet, private environment helps people feel respected and safe—key ingredients for open, honest dialogue. Consider how the space is set up, where is everyone sitting, how much personal space does everyone have, it’s all important for everyone to feel safe. Emotional space is equally important. Creating psychological safety—where people feel they can speak without fear of judgment or punishment—is crucial when navigating sensitive topics.
Side-by-side conversations
Recent research from Greene King, released to mark Prostate Cancer Awareness Month in partnership with Macmillan Cancer Support, found that 52% of men feel more comfortable having difficult conversations side by side rather than face to face. That might mean walking together, driving, or sitting side-by-side in a relaxed setting—approaches that feel less confrontational and more supportive.
This reinforces the idea that space isn’t just about privacy—it’s about comfort and connection. Side-by-side conversations may remove the intensity of direct eye contact and help people open up more freely.
Set the scene for success
In this short video our Head of Professional Practice, Dr Barrie Kennard, explains how giving space – physically and emotionally – can lead to better outcomes in challenging conversations. Learn how to create the right conditions for open, honest dialogue that builds trust.
Because when you choose the right time, in the right space, you create the right conditions for change.
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